It being Karva Chauth today, I got reminded of an incident that compelled me to write down my thoughts.
A few years ago, a lady on my Facebook list posted something to the effect – ‘Women talk about feminism & then go ahead & take their husband’s surname.’ There were a few who agreed with her; a few erupted.
2013 & 2014 Teej
Everyone was entitled to her/ his opinion but, for me, the concept of ‘choice’ came to light. That, I believe, was the turning point of my concept of feminism. For me, feminism = choice. Plain & simple! If a woman has a choice to do something, she chooses to do something out of her own free will, without harming anyone else, that’s feminism.
Every year, I read articles by ‘woke’ women how ‘Karva Chauth’ is a blot on feminism & bolsters patriarchy. But tell me, if I fast for my husband out of my own free will, how can I be questioned? If MIL/ family/ society have not created an environment where I feel compelled to go on a fast against my wishes or if it is being enforced on me, how dare anyone question what I want to do?
If my ‘vrat’ harms none (rather detoxes my body), who gave anyone the right to take away my right? A lot of husbands fast along with their wives & that is completely their will. If, as a woman, you insist that your husband go on a fast with you, sorry, not happening.
2016 
2017 
2019 
2020 
2015
There are much bigger problems that we women must contend with. Let us not miss the woods for the trees.
I celebrate Teej (or Bihari Karva Chauth). In my first year of marriage, I read the Teej Katha which had atrocious things like ‘the one who doesn’t fast isn’t a good wife/ the one who doesn’t fast will be reincarnated as an ant’. <eyeroll> I simply dropped reading the Katha.
Everyone around me does an extreme version of the vrat with no food & no water. I am the happy go lucky kind who eats fruits etc. It is all about My Choice.
2018, 2021 & 2022 Teej
Lastly, I do not get many opportunities to dress up. So why shouldn’t I grab one if I am getting it? :D
So, ladies & gentlemen, before you raise eyebrows or point fingers, just ask – is it choice or compulsion?
P.S. I can’t wait to see all the beautiful ladies dressed up in your finery!
